Irreverent Jokes

The teacher gave her fith grade class an assignment:Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day the kids came back and one-by-one began to tell their stories. " Johnny do you have a story to share?", the teacher asked.
Yes ma'am Johnny replied. " My daddy told me a story about my aunt Nancy."She was a pilot in Desert Storm and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy terriritory and all she had was a samll flask orf whiskey, a pistol,and a survival knife. She drank the whiskey on the way down. So it wouldnt break, and then her parachute landed right in the middle of 20 enemy troops. She shot 15 of em with the gun until she ran out of bullets,killed 4 mor with the knife till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.
"Good Heavens,"cried the horrifed teacher. "wat kind kind of moral did ur daddy give u from this horrible story?"
"Stay the heck away form Aunt Nancy when she's drinkin."




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Three stranger strike up a conversation in the airport passenger lounge in Bozeman, Montana awaiting their flights.
One is an American indian passing thru from Lame Deer. Another is a cowboy on his way to Billings for a livestock show, and the third passenger is a fundamentalist Arag student,newly arrived at the MSU. from the middle east.
Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures . Soon the two westerners learn that the Arab is a devout,radical muslim and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull.
The cowboy leans back in his chair,crosses his boots on a magazine table and tips his big sweat-stsained hat foward over his face. The wind outside is blowing tumbleweeds around, and the old windsock is flappin, but still no plane comes.
Finally the indian clears his throat and soflty he speaks ," At one time here, my people were many, but sadly, now we are few."
The Muslim studnet raises an eyebrow and leans forward ,"Once my people were few," he sneers, "and now we are many. Why do you spose that is?"
The Cowboy shifts his toothpick to one side and from the darkenss beneath his Stetson says in a drawl,"Thats because we aint played cowboys and muslims yet,but i do believe it's a-comin."

Relyt wrote:

."Thats because we aint played cowboys and muslims yet..."

If only!! That would be fun to watch!

LOVED the last one!!!

I was totally picking up a ---- vibe in the first joke... which I found to be really funny.

Mod Edit: Please keep all comments clean. References to body functions may be edited, based on topic. It is quite clear that many to not appreciate what can be deemed "crude humor."

curiosity kills.....

The admin gets edited by the moderator... that in itself if funny.

Brian wrote:

The admin gets edited by the moderator... that in itself if funny.

I thought you would see the humor in that.

But lets get back to the subject. Here we have another joke that some sensitive people won't be able to share with their muslim friends. At least I can't share it with my homosexual friends because I think that they are muslim....... where will this end?????????

I'm all for the racist jokes...keep 'em comin'!! 8o)

No poop jokes, then racist jokes! The grand pooba has spoken.

Brian wrote:

No poop jokes, then racist jokes! The grand pooba has spoken.

did anyone else notice that pooba has the word "poo" in it? Where is our moderator????????

Now, now, children....we must draw the line somewhere. We all say "hello" when we answer the phone, don't we?

Now now sis.. Dont forget that we are sposed to "Praise the Lord" when we answer the phone..

aint that right anna?

Amanda wrote:

Brian wrote:

The admin gets edited by the moderator... that in itself if funny.

I thought you would see the humor in that.

Heh. *I* certainly saw the humor in it!

how do you praise the Lord when you answer the phone?

ur sposed to say it...bumphead

Jesse wrote:

how do you praise the Lord when you answer the phone?

*scoffs* You're not up to date on your family stories, are you Jessoka?

Jesoka... only one "s" as read on the neon's license plates which only Gavin drives now. hehe

I've doubled over in pain from laughter enough this week. I don't think I can handle any family stories right now.

I invented it, I can spell it however I want.